When I was in Olympos on the Mediterranean coast of Turkey, I met a Dutch couple hanging around the tree house camp. The guy (whose name I have now forgotten) asked me what the single most "sticking" thing would be about my year of travel and living overseas. "Sticking?" I asked. "Yeah, like what really sticks to you," he clarified.
I thought for a second and despite being very tired of travel these days, the one thing that bubbled to the surface was this: the incredible generosity of people who have so little to share.
I explained how I marveled at how people struggled on a daily basis to feed themselves and yet, if a foreigner walked by, they would invite them into their home for tea and a meal. I was moved by, over and over, how when Hassan would finally get some cash in his pocket from his corrupt, thieving boss, how immediately he would give some to his sisters or to a friend who had even less. And if we were eating a tajine just made for the two of us and a friend of his walked by, he would invite them to join us. It was not right to eat in front of others without offering for them to join you, even if there was not enough food to go around.
The guy who had asked the question nodded adamantly and said that he had experienced much the same thing during his work in the military, meeting people in some countries who would give you their last scrap of food, even if they themselves were starving.
I asked him, "Why do you think this is so? Why does the more a person have, the less he wants to share? It is so opposite of how it should be! Why is it that the deeper the pocket, the smaller the heart?" We discussed this for some time, that maybe the mentality of generosity has to do with survival because in some of these places, if you don't share, everyone loses. Maybe there is no simple answer. Or maybe these people, having so little, haven't forgotten the real values in life of friendship, family and good will towards humanity. They aren't worried about keeping up with the Joneses because nobody has anything. Life is humble and still basically about survival and therefore, they aren't consumed by accummulating stuff? I don't know.
And we marveled at how people in the West have so much, more than they could ever realize and yet, will share so little with those around them.
But it is not just about money. It is also about the very human interactions between people who are still living a village sort of life where you don't "keep to yourself" but you take interest in those around you. I will never forget how I could get into a giant shared taxi in Morocco and everyone would start chatting up a storm and slapping each other on the back and calling each other huwya:"brother." Even when I was sure they all must know each other and would ask the answer would be, "nope."
I'll never forget the smiles and welcomes and "how are you doing?"s I would get from the little shop owners each time I would stop by to buy some eggs or yogurt. Moroccans are especially the masters of greeting each other; their greetings go on for many minutes. Boy, going to a regular grocery store when I get home is going to feel so cold and impersonal. :)
If I can pass on one thing I've learned and if there is one thing I hope I can embody as I return home, it's to carry this spirit of generosity with me: generosity of spirit and also of money or however else I can help those around me.
As Hassan had once explained to me when I asked how someone with so little can still give so much (and I will paraphrase):
"It's like there's a breadbasket that's going around. It's gets passed from person to person. It gets passed to you and you pass it along. You don't hang onto it because it will come back around again. It always comes back around."
